Tip for dating a single dad
Given these statistics, if you are a single adult, it would not be surprising that you find yourself attracted to someone who has children. Census, in 2010 there were close to 12 million single-family households in America.In the four years since the birth of my daughter and the end of my relationship with her mother, I have done some dating.Most of that dating was fairly casual, but I have been in a couple relationships—the most recent and most serious of those relationships having lasted just under two years. Or at least I realize now looking back on it just how easy it was.
We started dating casually, but we fell for each other hard and fast.
This is important because you cannot separate the parent from the children. Often, the attention, time and resources that a parent devotes to his/her children can make one feel jealous or resentful. Single parents are likely to set basic boundaries with regards to their children. Sometimes when we meet the kids we want to make a good impression.
If you are dating a parent, their children will be part of the picture at some point. Are you self-assured and independent enough to accept that the children of your date will be the priority? These boundaries can range from time devoted to children, to dietary/nutrition concerns, to when late night guests are acceptable. If you are dating a single parent and your relationship has progressed to the point where you spend time together with the kids, notice how your date parents, the kids’ behaviors, and the family culture. Maybe we try too hard: excessively friendly, overly generous, or uncomfortably upbeat. It is natural that children may be somewhat leery of a new person in the mix.
It wasn’t long before we were discussing where we wanted to live when we moved in together, how we would integrate our families, and what our wedding would be like.
At that point, after more than our share of failed relationships, we both genuinely thought we had found “the one.” ◊♦◊ The day I was granted equal custody of my daughter fell smack-dab right in the middle of our relationship, and looking back, it was a defining moment for us—the day I can pinpoint as the beginning of the end.